College Prompt Essay Final Draft

If there’s one thing you should know about me, it’s that I loved the sciences. I would consider it as my passion; I need science in my life. It's been, and still is, a big part of my life, from my extreme amount of science books, to it being my favorite subject. Most people consider me weird, a know-it-all even, because of my unecessarily excessive knowledge of things most people don't know about. I always need an answer to everything; if someone states a fact, I automatically need reasoning. Even today, my parents still have to endure my constant questions about anything, from how the world works, to things even my parents can't give me an answer to. Since I was a child, I've always been known to be the curious one, the one to ask, "Why?" or How?" And I still continue to be that person. My obsessive need to know everything about everything still runs through me, and although it may be a bad thing sometimes, I consider it to be a good characteristic.

Growing up with both parents working in the medical field, their time was almost always consumed by work. However, my parents had always bought me books, and that was enough to distract me from complaining about how little I saw them. I often spent my time reading scary stories and question-and-answer books. But I soon grew to love science books in particular. Occasionally, when I got sick of my science books, I would peek through my parents’ medical books. As I looked at all of the injuries and disorders, I knew one thing I was sure of: I was never going into the medical field. However a few observations and an open mind changed my opinions drastically.

My parents were always considered as the people to go to when they needed the support. Whenever relatives or family friends had problems at home, or even high blood pressure, they would ask my parents for advice. And I really liked that. I wanted to become the person everyone goes to for support. I wanted to help people, to know that I’ve changed someone’s life. And before I knew it, I was looking through jobs in the medical field. The medical field created a big impact in my life. Thinking about it now, it’s impossible to love science and hate the medical field, but I did, and I don’t regret it. But being in the medical field satisfies not only my need for science, but my need to help people as well.

Word Choice Olympics

1. Joyous: As I stepped on the porch, I heard the delightful sound of my children laughing. I walked towards the door carefully, trying not to make a sound. After taking a deep, calming breath, I knocked on the door three times, very eager to see my family. "I'M HOME," I shouted as the door creaked open. I opened my arms, pulling my children into a tight hug. I opened my eyes to see my wife, smiling at me, and at that moment, I knew I was home.
2. Intense: She raised the gun with her shaky hands, and stared directly to my eyes. "I told you not to trust me," she purred. I should have known better than to let a stranger come into my home, but then again, she was an attractive, beguiling snake. Come on, think straight, I thought to myself as I remembered that my life was in her hands.
3. Nerve-wracking: The score was at a tie, and with our last chance to win, this moment became nerve-wracking. The crowd was silent as they anticipated to find out which team is taking the gold medal home. Before I knew it, the ball came towards me with full force. And at that moment, the world stopped. I knew that wherever this ball lands determines where our future goes. I ran towards the ball, feeling the sand between my toes. I jumped, then spiked the ball to the opposing team. The ball landed in a thud on their court. "We won. WE WON!" My teammate yelled. I couldn't believe it. I let out a shaky breath, and laughed. "Yeah, we did," I breathed out.

Frigid: I continued to walk, pulling my books closer to my chest. I knew someone, or something, was following me. The cold air and stillness of the trees compelled me to walk faster. You'll be fine, I thought to myself, but that thought soon seemed to be impossible when I heard and inhumane growl behind me. My skin prickled with fear as I turned around. It was black, resembled the looks of a wolf, and was almost as tall as a horse. It stared at me with its seemingly golden eyes. It growled at me again, looking hungrier by the second. I turned, and ran. I looked at the bridge and knew that it was a matter between life and death.

Pessimistic: Just a bit longer. Just a bit longer, and it'll all be over. I never wanted to have this birthday party in the first place. I'm thirteen years old; birthday parties are for children. My mom just had to call everyone from my class and invite them over for a "celebration". I don't consider this a celebration if I'm not having any fun. Shaking my legs and fidgeting with my hands, I get antsy for this cursed party to end.
   

College Prompt Essay Draft

University of California - San Francisco

• Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community, or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.

Growing up with both parents working in the medical field, their time was almost always consumed by work. I often spent my time reading scary stories and question-and-answer books. If there’s one thing you should know about me, it’s that I loved the sciences. I would consider it as my passion; I need science in my life. Occasionally, when I got sick of my science books, I would peek through my parents’ medical books. As I looked at all of the injuries and disorders, I knew one thing I was sure of: I was never going into the medical field. However a few observations and an open mind changed my opinions drastically.

My parents were always considered as the people to go to when they needed the support. Whenever relatives or family friends had problems at home, or even high blood pressure, they would ask my parents for advice. And I really liked that. I wanted to become the person everyone goes to for support. I wanted to help people, to know that I’ve changed someone’s life. And before I knew it, I was looking through jobs in the medical field. The medical field created a big impact in my life. Thinking about it now, it’s impossible to love science and hate the medical field, but I did, and I don’t regret it. But being in the medical field satisfies not only my need for science, but my need to help people as well.

• Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution, or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are?

Today, I’m known as the goody two-shoes with the good grades, but even though my GPA may be high, it hasn’t always been like that for me. When I was younger, school was never really important to me. I didn’t pay attention to my grades, let alone realize how important they would be in the future. However, in the sixth grade, I had gotten fairly good grades, or so I thought. My two closest friends, who had done much better than me, were happy that I ended up with what I had gotten, but I wasn’t. I came home to share my grades with my parents, who were ecstatic, but that was where I realized that I could do so much better. 

I started to study more for my tests; to put more effort into my homework. I paid so much more attention to my grades, to the point where my GPA the most important thing to me. I studied when I first got to school, and as soon as I stepped foot in my home. And my hard work and determination had lead me to leave the eighth grade in the top 5 of my class. I continued to work as hard as I could in school, and it has gotten me so far. I realized that anyone could change. Anyone can become whoever he or she would like to be. All they need is support, determination, and a little push.

College Prompts

1. University of California-San Francisco

All applicants must respond to two essay prompts — the general prompt and either the freshman or transfer prompt, depending on your status.

Responses to your two prompts must be a maximum of 1,000 words total.

Allocate the word count as you wish. If you choose to respond to one prompt at greater length, we suggest your shorter answer be no less than 250 words.

Freshman applicant prompt

Describe the world you come from — for example, your family, community or school — and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.

Prompt for all applicants

Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are?

2. University of Pennsylvania

Common Application Essay prompts for 2013 - 2014

(minimum of 250 words with maximum of 650)

• Some students have a background or story that is so central to their identity that they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story.
• Recount an incident or time when you experienced failure. How did it affect you, and what lessons did you learn?
• Reflect on a time when you challenged a belief or idea. What prompted you to act? Would you make the same decision again?
• Describe a place or environment where you are perfectly content. What do you do or experience there, and why is it meaningful to you?
• Discuss an accomplishment or event, formal or informal, that marked your transition from childhood to adulthood within your culture, community, or family.

3. University of Hawaii-West Oahu

Applicants will also be required to submit one letter of recommendation from a teacher and/or counselor and a one-page personal essay (Essay topic: Tell us about yourself and explain why you have chosen UH West O`ahu for your academic studies).